listening to chris brown's 'Run It'...
Sigh... I think my new year resolution #2 is going poof with all the cannot-make-it drivers on the road. Have been meeting at least one per day since Saturday. I'm about to tear my hair out.
I've been a friendly road user since I started driving years back.
However, recently there are just too many motorists that make me shake my fist and punch their teeth out. Road rage alert!
1. Inconsiderate slow drivers
Stop hogging the right lanes if you are planning to travel at 60 or 70km/h. Read the road signs, baby. 90!!! 60+30 or 70+20! We're not rushing anywhere, but we just wanna cruise at the optimum speed. Get out of my way! *Honk honk honk honk honk*
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2. Drivers who don't signal
Hi, shall I help you smash up your signal lights? They are redundant for you anyway. You refuse to indicate directions, and tend to cut into my lane at the last minute. What's the point in having those lights? I'll get rid of them for you free of charge.
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3. Drivers who step on their brakes unnecessarily
Although lunar new year is round the bend, your cars are not new year accessories. The flashing red brake lights do not add to the festive mood, but rather to my blackening mood.
Why the hell do you keep stepping on your brakes?!?! This is a straight road, and the next car is at least 50m away. We're behind you, so when you suddenly stop, we have to do the same. The jerking motions make me wanna hurl. We ought to go up to your car and puke through your window. Good things must share.
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4. S-shape drivers
You are either drunk or a reincarnated snake. These people can't drive straight in their lanes. They titter at the edge of the lane markers, and just when we think they're about to change lanes, they cut back in. We have to swerve back in order not to hit their sides.
We also pay road tax ok?! One lane for you, one for me. If you think you should travel in the middle of two lanes, please pay double the road tax.
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5. Speedy Gonzales
The complete opposite of type 1. I repeat: 90 km per hour. 130 is not 90, 150 is not 90. I'm already doing hundred, hundred and ten. Stop tailgating me. Mr Policeman is going to catch you. Neh-neh-boo-boo...
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6. Mr/ Ms/ Mdm Kiasee
Go. Just go. Just do it, dammit! You can exit the filter lane liao, the oncoming traffic is far far away. ALAMAK! Why the hell are you stopping??? The light is not turning red yet, you can proceed. Please move. Pleeeeeease. Ugh! You're not budging and I'm stuck behind you. Now I'm going to be late.
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7. Mr Racer
I'm not discriminating, but they are mostly guys. Zappy is black, but that doesn't make me a speed devil. I don't drive a Subaru, Honda, or some race-worthy cars. Zappy doesn't have a giant spoiler protruding from his butt, and he's got no stickers that scream "Race me race me!". Go look for someone else. I'll have to modify my engine illegally or buy a new ride if I want to compete against you. I'm not crazy.
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There are many other variants. Don't let me meet them anymore. My karma is suffering from all my cursing and swearing.
7 comments:
okok...I hate to say this,but I do fall into some, not MOST of your catgories!eh..the signal lights being redundant bit(thanks, but no thanks, dad will kill me if u smash them), the weaving in and out of lanes(eh..was tryin to pick up my phone lah!!)...ok, tt's all I'm guilty of.:P U will never find me travelling at 60-70 in the right lane, most likely way above..OPPS...
totally agree with you!!!! down with 'em crap drivers!!!... ;p
Am (only) half-ashamed to confess that I get very agitated and aggro when I drive around these pple. Especially when 4 cars cut into my lane 2 metres in front of me without signalling in the space of 10 minutes and taxis doing illegal u-turns from the 2nd lane from the right.
*mutter mutter*...
sy: that makes you a speedy gonzale snake who doesn't signal. *evil eye*... wouldn't want your dad to kill me instead, so i shall let your lights off.
e: let's form a 'cut-crap-drivers-club', CCC. you can smash sy's lights. hahahaha!!!
Hehhehee. I'm glad I seldom drive nowadays. Don't wanna bump into you on the roads :P
eh... no leh. i just wanna drive her (dad's) car... ;p
eh... no leh. i just wanna drive her (dad's) car... ;p
andrea: paste a sign on your car to indicate you're friend. in CCC, we cut friends slack. muahaha... u can paste sign on ur bike too :)
e: i shall put sy in my boot. u drive her dad's car.
sy: zappy's boot is spacious. you will like it. *evil luff*
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