When one million people turn up, this is what happens

Last night was a sheer nightmare for a demophobe like me.

(Yes I hate crowds. I had a panic attack when I tried to take the bus last year. Called my sister and two friends so that they could reassure me that the other passengers weren't trying to murder me or something. It's different when I'm working coz I could always beat them off with the microphone.)

Back to the story. Armin Van Buure had a gig at Zouk last night and 1/4 of Singapore's population turned up (I was going to say half the population, but two million sounds way too exaggerated).
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8pm: We actually went early to get tickets and luckily we did that. By nine, the queue snaked all the way to the back of the carpark. One of the bouncers was awfully rude, but I guess if I were him, I could be a worse bitch.

915pm: Ms Chong cleverly pointed out that the Velvet line wasn't too bad and we got in quite effortlessly. After that we headed off to show D and L what CNY in Chinatown was all about.

(Yes I hate crowds but we still went to Chinatown. Surprisingly, it wasn't too crowded. Even the LCG bak kuah stall was manageable. If I truly wanted to bring some bak kuah to Zouk, it would probably take me only 10minutes to get to the front of the queue. But bak kuah on the dance floor would cramp my style, so I gave it a miss.)
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11pm: Drove back the club. WHOA. Mayhem. Line in front of Velvet had extended to the hotel. Zouk and Phuture queues were curlier than the steel wool that you use to wash pots. Even the re-entry lines were crazy. Everyone was pushing everybody else. Lots of squabbles occured.

Me to the guy who was trying to make his way to the front: Excuse me, can you stop pushing me.
Guy: (acts deaf)
Me: Please queue properly. Your elbow is hitting my boob.
Guy: (stops pushing immediately)

Kay 1: guy 0
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TY to some girls who tried to overtake us by charging through: Excuse me, you have to go to the back of the line.
Girl: Oh, we're trying to get to our friends.
TY: So? We're trying to get to our friends too.
Girl: (stares blankly and continues to squeeze through)
TY: STOP PUSHING AND QUEUE UP!!!

TY 0.5: girls 1 (cos they ignored and continued their inconsiderate act. If TY had really punched them like how she wanted, score would be TY 100000: girls 0)
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1130pm: Inside Velvet finally. Not packed at all. Can't stand it when clubs pretend to be at their max capacity by making patrons wait outside. Oh well, at least we had room to move around and order drinks. Bei and WQ decided to be bad parents and deserted their baby to join us last night. Then we also met our old friends, the bartenders S and C who used to be at Winebar. Nice!!!

1215am: Group moved off to Zouk. OMG. Bad choice. I stepped on multiple toes, punched a few people in the stomach by accident, shoved everybody who was shoving me. I finally knew the magic formulae.

1/4 Singapore's population = 1/8 in the queues outside Zouk + 1/8 on Zouk's dance floor.

1am: Back in Velvet at D and L's request. Think the tourists had enough of crazy crowds.

130am: Flaming lamborhs at Wine Bar before going off for supper. Tourists stayed behind for hot dancing girls. We went off for hot bak kut teh soup.
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I hate crowds.